i hope one day i will be as cool as all of these women.

thanksgiving was good. i watched "stop making sense" with my mom and ate turkey for the first time in 6 years. tomorrow i will hopefully be reunited with some more old friends. being here is making it even harder to decide what i am going to do next year.

i go home tomorrow morning.

i want to see him and i want him to see me and feel upset and i want to feel upset and i want us to feel upset together and talk about it. but really, is there anything more to talk about? i think i'm the only one hung up on this.

it's not a good idea.

considering everything.

but i am not one for being sensible.

some songs that remind me of the cold times ahead. download it here.


1. el perro del mar - "here comes that feeling"
2. herman dune - "when the water gets cold and freezes on the lake"
3. paul baribeau - "christmas lights"
4. nedelle - "the natural night"
5. julie doiron - "will you still love me in december?"
6. beat happening - "christmas"
7. my brightest diamond - "the robin's jar"
8. one of the boys - "things happen in the winter, pt. 1"
9. pixies - "winterlong"
10. jens lekman - "the cold swedish winter"
11. the microphones - "i want to be cold"
12. the horns of happiness - "white snow"
13. lovers - "frozen floods"
14. saturday looks good to me - "last night i fell asleep on your floor"
15. yeah yeah yeahs - "cold night"
16. pavement - "summer babe (winter version)"
17. final fantasy - "arctic circle"
18. songs: ohia - "peoria lunch box blues"
19. devics - "song for a sleeping girl"
20. the arcade fire - "in the backseat"

i am holed up in my room. charlotte has some dancers over and i don't want to wander into the living room and scare them away in my disheveled and sleepy state. i would really like a cigarette though. it is so tempting just to light one up in here. very uneventful weekend. i leave for bloomington wednesday morning. i can't wait to go back home, even if just for a little bit. i think i'll be home for all of christmas break as well. hopefully this christmas break will be better than the last. 

the photos are old. probably from around fall of my senior year in high school. i just recently scanned them. i thought they'd be appropriate since i am seeing all of these folks very very soon.

i have the fucking coolest schedule ever for next semester!

monday:

(2:00 - 5:45) directed projects: the portrait

(6:20 - 9:50) film genres: children & other talking animals

tuesday: 

(11:00 - 12:15) aesthetic history of photography

(12:30 - 1:45) sex, gender, and the bible

(3:30 - 4:45) film genres: children & other talking animals (rct)

wednesday:

no class

thursday: 

(11:00 - 12:15) aesthetic history of photography

(12:30 - 1:45) sex, gender, and the bible

(2:00 - 3:15) sex, gender, and the bible (rct)

friday

no class

you're gonna charm the world

it's waiting for you