i've never been really self conscious about this before, but in recent years it has been pointed out that i talk out of the side of my mouth. i always sort of knew i did that, but didn't really see it as a problem (probably cause i don't actually watch myself talk). but the more and more i think about it, the more i think something is wrong with me.
i want to write a letter to everyone i know telling them how i feel. my problem is that i'm hung up on far too many insignificant things. i'm indecisive. i don't let things go. i pretend feelings that aren't there still exist. what am i supposed to do? everyone tells me i'm better off now. without him, living in new york. i think everyone just thinks my life is glamorous or something. maybe they're right, maybe it would be wrong for me to move backwards. maybe all i really want is for an attractive man to wrap me in tin foil in his car. i think that's the answer to my problems.
i am past the point of feeling overwhelmed. now i'm just pretending my problems don't exist. i don't know if that's better or worse.
i hear people talking in the other room. i so badly want to be part of their conversation but for some reason, i feel like i can't go in there.
thanksgiving break wasn't long enough.
